Lizard Tales Part 2 of the Tour Log (by Martin Newell) 

Bristol-Tuesday 
Along this amazing cycle path on an old railway line all the way to Bristol (about 13/14 miles) Spent hours hanging about in traffic near a rather soul-less shopping centre. Didn't busk. Had to keep phoning Deltic to find out what was happening -v.Frustrating and tiring. Nel staying with some rather bohemian (in an Eighties way) people he knows. I wanted to go back to Lol's. Bloody had enough of Bristol city centre. We did one interview and photo-session with a real bonehead who asked us: 
" Wouldn't it have been easier to do it by car?" (!!!) Nel patiently explained that the whole point of doing a Green tour was that we did it all by bike. 
Bath is a lovely old place. Wouldn't mind living there. Maybe a bit snotty but great for busking. You need a license, apparently. Got a live phone-in with GLR tonight. 
Come all this way west so I can speak to someone on the phone in London. That's showbiz. Got two interviews tomorrow, one in Bristol and one in Bath in the afternoon. Looking forward to a quiet night in with a couple of beers tonight. 
A bit tired and slightly disorientated by now, which is to be expected I suppose. 
People don't seem so different as you cross England east to west really. 
Some friendly hippies and punks and some unfriendly androids. Most of the newspaper people have been very nice. 
Record company well-pleased with tour 
FLASHBACK. 
That first place we stayed in. "Very very nice." Snailwell. A Mrs M. Sign said Thank You For Not Smoking, in the hall. Half expected to see a sign in the bedroom saying 
Thank You For Not Wanking. Just outside Newmarket, oh yeah. No food. I remember. 

Red Lynch Thurs 19th October 

8 miles outside Salisbury and afflicted by fairly severe melancholy. Partly caused by tiredness but mostly due to the fact we've left the west and are heading south again. 
Bath was brilliant and so was Lol's house. I felt truly at home and relaxed there. 
Bath is a heady place, set in steep green hills. One gets the impression that Bath was always a nice place. The three days based in Bath had softened me up somewhat. 
Evenings were pleasant and punctuated by beer and smoke. We had lots to talk about and I got softened up so that by the time this morning, when I found myself on the road to Salisbury, I was sad and resentful at having to leave. Just past Warminster I felt the magic had gone and I bitched and moaned all the way.

Sat Morning. 
On a train out of Southampton. (Tour interrupted by important Emergency gig in London) Red Lynch was one of those snotty horrible southern places just out of a main town. The attitudes in the pub were of cold Thatcher conservativism.. Sometimes I don't know why I like England so much 
Because some of its people are horrible. Small-minded philistines who only care about their money. 

Southampton is a fairly unspeakable place. Did some busking and made some money. Deltic hadn't got much for us to do. One interview but the reporter was in court. Left info and CD for him. Absolutely pissing with rain. Feel a bit worried about money as I'm now down to my last nine quid or so in the bank. Very emotionally fragile at the moment. Maybe it was the rapid changes of terrain. We went across 
The Mendip Hills, across Salisbury Plain and through the New Forest all in 24 
Hours. From Bath to Southampton. What a bloody change! 

The wonderful Geoff Wall, who put us up, lives in Sholing, the heart of suburban normality. He doesn't go to the pub much, so we took him out to his local, which because of the fierce storm, wasn't very populated. However, the people in there 
were thuggish and morose. The only levity displayed by them seemed to be at our expense. They pointed and laughed while they thought we couldn't see. X-pensive beer too. 

Now en route for London for more filming and London Greenpeace gig that's come up. I'm now over the shock of leaving Bath but still disorientated. Feel like I've been travelling for months. Feel out of control. 

SUNDAY 22nd. En route to Brighton. 

Good gig at Red Lion Square last night. Photos in Hyde Park and more filming on the street in Bayswater Road. Quite a lot of pressure in a way, but taking it more or less in our stride. Gig was like an outdoor hippy festival…only indoors. Lots of hippies and alternative theatre, kids running round everywhere, dogs barking and pissing in the hall. Shared a crowded backstage room with theatrical types. Bloke called John Hegley, a poet, due later. 

Met Robyn Hitchcock briefly at Hyde Park gates. He called out to Captain Sensible from his car and then pulled over for a chat ( See Pic) He came over to the office later on but we missed him because we were already cycling to Holborn from Notting Hill for a soundcheck which never happened. Went to the pub after the gig, with Capt, McQueen, Tom the director, Caron, Shu etc. Had a few pints then a hairy cycle back to Notting Hill Gate. Up Oxford Street in the pissing rain overtaking buses and trying to avoid legions of drunks singing and shouting at the tops of their voices. Had some strong vodka as a nightcap and crashed out. 
Breakfast at noon today in Tuber U R Partial To. Radio interview and gig in Brighton. 

Brighton Mon 23rd. 

Sitting outside a healthfood restaurant in a shopping precint. Just busked and did a TV 
Appearance for Southern. The Radio interview at BBC Sussex went well…apart from the CD letting us down(faulty) The gig at The Royal George was good. The audience 
Noticeably cooler, The landord, an amazing bloke assured us we'd done well and that he wanted us back again. Captain's house much the same, maybe a bit tidier. Stayed behind after the gig for a late drink with the landlord. Cycling home with Captain, through the sidestreets and lanes singing in an alien voice, somebody slung a big metal fire-exstinguisher out of a car at me. Just missed me. Might have really injured me. Too drunk to care. Nel is a bit short of sleep. Feel like I've been away for ages. 
Nel's been asked to audition for New Model Army.. McQueen and I have told him to go for it. 

Ditchling Tues 24th 

Beautiful but very car-choked village after a heady ride down from the Beacon. 812 ft high and fantastic views of The Downs and surrounding countryside. We're doing Derek Jameson's Sky TV chat show in London, so we'll have to change our strings. Etc etc. Bit of tension here. England is so vast from a bike. The ride down from the Beacon is a very steep and twisty little road and the views are not unlike those from an aeroplane flying low over the land. The late October sun shines on the back gardens of and on the washing lines in late morning early afternoon. 

Portobello Rd. Thurs? 

In a bar at lunchtime the day after doing The Jameson Show. Got to London late afternoon and cycled to the TV studio in Soho. Overpoweringly hot…sitting in make-up room when Paul Hill of The Guildford Four( just out of jail) came in with a few friends and family. Shook hands said hallo and wandered out again. Just started being made up when Del boy came in. He shook my hand and said " Hello Paul." 
I said: " I'm not Paul, I'm Martin."He mumbled his apologies, jumped the make-up queue and I stood around. I didn't know why Andy McQueen and Nel were laughing. On the way down to Hospitality Lounge; Andy explained to me that Jameson had mistaken me for Paul Hill because we both look pale with angular features. 
I said: " Well it's the first time I've been mistaken for an innocent man." 
Other guests included Andrew Morton, a royal biographer, a comedian/conjurer, who had a rather bad time and got his spot cut down. Elvis Costello's Pete Thomas was the 
musical director and had the house band. Nice guy. Told him how much I liked his drumming on King Horse. Rehearsals were a bit fraught but okay. We played right next to Jameson's desk and apart from a few nerves were apparently quite good. Clare Grogan and Alexandra Pigg sat on the set-couch and yattered all the way through our spot. Rosie the stage manager said we'd gone down very well with the studio audience. Afterwards, went over the road to the pub. Took it in turns to watch the bikes. Phoned my mum with McQueens yuppie phone and spoke to her for the first time since the family row five years ago.
Had to. Shu told me to when we had a heart-to-heart in Swindon. Not fair that she's reading about me, hearing me on the radio and seeing me on telly and we're not talking. Unfair advantage to me. 

When London's good it's very good. Fast-paced and heady. When it's bad it's suffocating. Having been indoors all day I feel a pressing need for fresh air and exercise. Captain took Nel and I round the corner to meet Brian James( The Damned) in his local but he'd already left. Not much on today and feeling very unused to lack of activity. 

Saturday 28th…City Of London University. 

Waiting to go on. A gig for Marxism Today. Not on for a while and far too hot in here. Day off on Wednesday. Thursday, over to Fortress Wapping for an interview with the News Of The World at 4p.m.Already sort of dreading the article. 
Then a frantic cycle dash from Wapping to Paddington for an interview at BFBS. 
Very nice people. Seemed to know all about The Cleaners From Venus. Then back to the pub for a drink with Andy and Captain. Captain not very happy with general difficulty in England, of selling records.