POEMS [] ARCHIVES [] LINKS [] BOOKS [] MUSIC [] ABOUT [] NEWS & GIGS [] CONTACT

Twenty Things You Never New All About Newell

  • 1) Destined to be unlucky in love, the main reason cited by partners leaving Newell has often been "I now realise that I need to go out with someone more conventional." 
  • 2) Newell worked as a postman for 8 months in Harpenden, Herts. during 1972. 
  • 3) When arrested with a small amount of cannabis that same year, Newell said he was carrying it for a girlfriend, an American hitchhiker who'd now moved on. The headline in the St Albans evening paper that July, read "Postman carried drug as 'Act of Chivalry'. 
  • 4) Newell went to school with Pierce Brosnan. 
  • 5) Newell aged 20, met Dave Dee, then A&R man for Atlantic. His first words were: "Ere, my mum used to like you on the telly. Are you still working then?" 
  • 6) Newell can't drive, has never been to a football match and is partly colour blind. 
  • 7) Newell once fell face down, drunk in front of Elkie Brooks who was judging a best band competition, which he had entered in 1974. 
  • 8) While filling in his passport-form when Newell was ten, his father came to the section entitled SpecialPeculiarities. "My God...I could write a bloody book." he said. 
  • 9) Late for a Red Wedge meeting in London in 1987, Newell and Captain Sensible, charging up a staircase at The Conway Hall crashed into a large clergyman, winding him. "Take more care boys." gasped Msgnr. Bruce Kent. 
  • 10) Newell has trained his dog Wulf to attack imaginary lawnmowers. But only rip-started ones. 
  • 11) Newell's mum was once on Opportunity Knocks, when it was a radio show in the forties.The song she sang, 'Beyond The Blue Horizon' is still sung by Newell sometimes. 
  • 12) Newell's middle brother is a dead ringer for Ian Botham. 
  • 13) Newell's Auntie, Molly Bolt is also a poet and has two collections published. 
  • 14) Newell is distantly related to Dennis Wheatley. They are not in touch each other. 
  • 15) Before working as no.1 back up singer for Boy George, Helen Terry was a sixteen year old Joplin sound-alike in Maldon, Essex, where her mother lived on a barge. She had a band, which she used to rehearse with which at one point featured a nineteen year on pedal-harmonium. Guess who he was. 
  • 16) At an R.A.F base in Lincolnshire in 1974, Newell's glam rock band, The Mighty Plod couldn't be bothered using the toilet, some distance from their dressing room. They utilised a revolving drum, generally used for Tombola tickets. At the end of the gig, realising that the military police were checking thedressing room to make sure everything was in order, Newell and the drummer, Ex, emptied the half full drum out of a first floor window. From the darkness came a shriek from a woman and angry oaths from a man. They never found out anything further. 
  • 17) For two years, Newell suspended a large inflatable seagull from his ceiling. He named the seagull Eric after the author of Love Story. 
  • 18) Aged seven, Newell once jammed part of a brick into his mouth as an experiment. It took his mother 5 minutes to extricate the object.
  •  
  • 19) After ingesting three very strong microdots of LSD, Newell was discovered by friends 12 hours later, in a neighbours garden, wrapped in a tartan blanket and repeatedly singing Marilyn, an old Pink Fairies song. 
  • 20) During a period of overwork in autumn of 1981, Newell's girlfriend called Cleaners drummer Lawrence Elliot and told him to come over straight away. Elliot found Newell in a state of hyper mania following a lunchtime drink and a bottle of cough medicine. He was engaged in the act of cooking two seven inch reels of master tapes under the kitchen grill. "That's no way to deal with this Martin." reasoned Elliot. "You're perfectly right." said Newell and threw the objects into a hot frying pan where he began basting oil over them with a wooden spoon. 

  •