Steve Dix...Comedian?

Raptus Regaliter

Foraging for food in the bins beside the Information Highway.

07.04.2009 08:17 - Firemen and Cats

They've just found a poor cat which has been buried for five weeks in the remains of the Cologne Stadtarchiv.  I think this points to the relative inefficiency of the German Firebrigade, because if it had been in America, then one of the firemen would have rushed into the building at the last minute, and come charging out holding the cat, which would have then said "meow, meow".

Then I thought again, because that's the scene you always see in practically every disaster movie (Even in "Star Trek: Generations").  A fireman charges into the building, moments before its collapse, the building then collapses, and the fireman comes marching out of the debris, holding the little kitten, which, on cue, says "Meow, meow".

It's ALWAYS a little kitten.  It's never a little puppy, or even an african grey parrot, is it?

And I think I know why.

I reckon the fire services have a deal with the animal shelters.  Every so often they adopt a little kitten.  The day of a fire, they draw lots, and the one who wins hides the kitten in his pocket.  On cue, he races into the burning building - actually just round the door - pulls out the kitten, waits for a spectacular piece of debris to come crashing down, and comes racing out.  The media gather round, the little kitten goes "Meow, Meow!" and Bob's your uncle.  Citations, awards, and interviews on "Rolf's Animal Hospital".

It can't be a puppy, because they'd howl the place down and piss in the pocket. It can't be a parrot, because, knowing firemen, it would pick up some of the more choice language. 

Besides, producing a parrot which went "Meow" would get big laughs.

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