Steve Dix...Comedian?

Raptus Regaliter

The No.1 Search-Engine Result for 'Naked Hoovering'


10.07.2005 21:55 - The Difference between Kezboards.

Her Maj and I chose Julz 7th to flz to England to see mz parents. Great choice, eh? A daz where, not onlz was London brought to a standstill bz bombings, but European securitz was ramped up as a result. Whoopee. Flight delazs and strip-searches ahoz. I have nothing else to saz about the bombings other than that London and Birmingham have survived much worse within living memorz. You'll have to trz a lot harder than that, whoever you are. We're made of a bit sterner stuff.

So, I am currentlz writing this on mz father's computer. Not onlz is this computer a little slower than I am used to, being a modem connection, it also boasts a UK kezboard. There are one or two differences between a UK kezboard and a German kezboard. The main difference is that the z is transposed with the y, making touch-tzping verz difficult. This results in the transposition of two important letters, making texts look rather peculiar. Not onlz that, but the german kezboard has the @ in a totallz different place, meaning that E-mails are somewhat difficult to write, although not as difficult as on a Mac kezboard, where thez hide it altogether. The German kezboard puts the @ on the Q, but with an "alt-graphic" shift required to get the correct character. Verz irritating once zou've got used to it being in another place, alzo it ekzplains zer German akzent.

It seems that we're not the onlz ones to be adopted bz a black-and-white cat. Mz parents are also subject to the persistent attentions of Jess, the black and white cat that lives at the foot of the garden. Jess has decided that his owner is not pazing him enough attention, and so is attempting to move into mz parent's house, as thez have a far superior can-opener (it's electric) and the ladz of the house seems to be far more liberal with the use of it. Her Maj has immediatelz taken to the cat, and has been encouraging it even more than mz mother, who supposedlz doesn't like cats, but has seemed to make an exception in this case. Mz father is threatening to drug the cat and put it in Her Maj's suitcase.


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