Steve Dix...Comedian?

Raptus Regaliter

Suffering delusions of adequacy since 2003.


17.01.2004 18:21 - Things My Girlfriend and I Have Argued About.

About two years ago Mike Whitaker introduced me to Mil Millington\'s website.  He did this mainly because, like Mr. Millington, I also have a German girlfriend.  Having since moved in with her, I have, again like Mr. Millington, found myself on the receiving end of Teutonic female logic. 

Any of you who speak German will know that it is a very logical, but difficult, language to get to grips with, as I have been doing for the past five years.  Not only does it, like French, have genders, (actually it has male, female and neuter) but it also has a totally confusing capacity to change sexes in the middle of a sentence, thanks to the difference between nominative, dative and accusative modes.  So you can actually find yourself referring to a female as masculine - \"Ich gebe das Geschenk der Frau\".  The sexing of different words can be sometimes confusing.  For example : Skirts (der Rock) are masculine, but trousers (die Hose) are feminine.   No wonder there\'s so many transvestites in Cologne.

Anyway, to return to my original point, good Ol\' Mil hasn\'t experienced the half of it, because, as an aid to understanding, I have to argue with my girlfriend in German, which means that I\'m not only having to work out the argument, but the akkusativ and dativ forms on the fly, AND this is usually happening whilst I\'m doing some form of DIY, which she seems to believe should be done with some sort of running commentary. 

It\'s at times like these sharp instruments are best removed from my reach.


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