Steve Dix...Comedian?

Raptus Regaliter

Suffering delusions of adequacy since 2003.

10.06.2006 22:53 - World Cuppery

So, it's finally on.

Are you sick of it yet?

I am heartily sick of all the cash-ins that are trying to persuade people to buy their product by featuring members of the German team, who are shamelessly accepting huge amounts of cash for endorsing the most tedious bollocks - sorry, Ballacks - out.

For example. McDonalds. Endorsed by someone who, I would hope, has the sense to avoid their products completely, as well as Coke - a drink that contains not only enough sugar to give the average elephant a light head upon consumption of a litre of the stuff, but an acid that is commonly used to burn surface rust off cars (read the ingredients on the can if you don't believe me! I used old, flat coke to derust the back axle on the Striker when I was building it!). Speaking of sugar, how about the long-standing ads for Nutella, in which most of the German national squad take part?

The most pathetic I've seen is Kerrygold's World Cup Butter.  

That's right.

Exactly the same butter as usual, but with a football printed on the wrapper. 

But the worst person for this is not one of the footballers.

Oh No.

It is "The Kaiser" : "Kaiser" Franz Beckenbauer. Good old Franz, who is the head of the World Cup Organisations Committee, never misses an opportunity to sell out, little media whore that he is. The Kaiser is rarely off german TV - it is a very rare commercial break in Germany that doesn't feature an ad with Kaiser Franz. He has advertised mobile phones, cars, foodstuffs, beer, the Postbank (it's just this minute been on- what did I tell you?) - anything in fact, apart from contraception, which wouldn't be a good idea given the amount of illegitimate children he's managed to father. Franz doesn't seem to have taken in and inwardly digested Bill Hick's comments about selling out.

I'm thinking of taking our TV back to the shop and complaining that there's something wrong with it. There's far too much Franz Beckenbauer on it.

Copyright © 2003-2011 Steve Dix