Steve Dix...Comedian?

Raptus Regaliter

I was a pilot in the USAF until I discovered that God was an egg in my lunchbox. So I ate him.

03.05.2006 13:00 - Mmmm Cake

The last few days have been spent in celebration of my 40th year. I've been marching round the city centre mumbling "pah! Flippin' kids!" and "Hah! The Youth of today!" and berating anyone younger than me with my new Zimmer Frame.

Her Maj had it in mind to bake a cake, and so we sat down to calculate the area required for us to house that many candles. Unfortunately, our calculations were interrupted by the awkward fact that, upon attempting to buy the candles for the birthday cake, we were informed that they weren't allowed to sell that many as it would constitute a fire hazard, and the cake would taste horrible due to all the wax dripping on it. Hmm. They've obviously never tasted Aldi Margarine. Pah! The youth of today. In my day, we would not only have found the most toxically dangerous candles possible, but we would have had a "Star Wars" figure on there as well, in danger of melting to to the proximity of the candles.[1]

Her Maj, however, saved the day by cooking a traditional German "Marmorkuchen" in a large doughnut cake mould that she inherited from her great grandmother. The hole in the middle was big enough for one, large, two-inch diameter candle from the local Home Tatt emporium (Seller of little plastic hearts, dried flowers and other trinkets that appeal to Her Maj's Magpie instincts).

Mmmmm Cake.

[1] My 13th birthday, as a matter of fact. My poor old Palitoy Han Solo was never quite the same. I like to think George Lucas got the idea of coating him in carbonite a year later from the wax-covered mess on top of the cake.

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