Steve Dix...Comedian?

Raptus Regaliter

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17.01.2006 20:51 - Nipples in Nippes

Nipples are a thing of wonder, especially ladies' nipples. Some good clean* fun can be had with nipples. The German word for "nipples" is "Brustwarzen", which translates as "Breast warts". It comes as no surprise that German does not belong to a class of languages (french, spanish etc) commonly referred to as "the Romantic languages". Anyone who refers to nipples as breast warts is far from romantic. In fact, the word can downright ruin your whole night. "Kiss my nipples" translated is "Kuss meine Brustwarzen", which comes back as "kiss my breast warts".


It takes all the eroticism out of it. Not only that but 'tweaking nipples' sounds like some sort of medical procedure :. "Ich will ihre Brustwarzen gezwicken."
"Were you in hospital yesterday Mrs Davies?"
"Ooh yes, I was having my breast-warts tweaked. Dr. Patel likes to empty the pus out of them every few months."

Now the Germans are sticklers for procedure. If you've ever tried to construct a sentence in German, which contains a nominative, a dative and an accusative section, all of which has to be parsed with germanic thoroughness to understand the meaning, and each of which has a different method of address depending on both the mode of address and the sex of the word, then you'll know why they can be such picky little buggers. You'd be picky if you had to construct sentences in this language. Most Germans have a problem with the ambiguity that exists in English, and try to correct it by being even more thorough.

Now add in "Brustwarze".

It comes as no surprise that german women view german men as extremely unromantic. It also goes to explain some of the more extreme literature available at certain specialist shops over here, which demonstrate a gynaecologically-explicit form of Teutonic thoroughness. Not that I read that stuff, of course - It's been education enough just looking at the stuff they put in the window.


* For varying amounts of "clean"

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