Steve Dix...Comedian?

Raptus Regaliter

Suffering delusions of adequacy since 2003.

10.11.2006 13:34 - A Mandolin In My Underpants

I'm packing for my trip to England. Our Guardians do not wish stringed instruments to be brought on as hand luggage, so I have to pack my mandolin in the hold. Unfortunately I am only allowed one suitcase, and I have already paid extra for the guitar I will be bringing.

So the Mandolin will have to go in the suitcase.

How to protect it from nasty whacks? Simple. Slide a pair of underpants over the body.

Unfortunately, at the airport there are random security checks. I am asked what is in my suitcase.

"A Mandolin".

The German security guard frowns. "You are not allowed to take animals on board in suitcase". This would be funny apart from the fact that his two associates are beginning to take an interest, and are packing Heckler / Koch machine-guns.

I explain it is a musical instrument. They demand to see it.

My suitcase is opened, and the mandolin is held in the air, by the security guard, still wrapped in my underpants.

"Why", asks the security guard, "do you have a mandolin in your underpants?"

"Because", I reply, "A guitar was too big".

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